Forever Divided
by triffickie
Summary: Only love isn't enough for a relantionship. A storm hits Neo-Midgar. [CloTi] BREAK-UP warning.
1. one day unlike yesterday

Forever Divided  
  
by Vera Priscaleth  
  
  
  
Genre: Romance/Angst  
  
Rating: PG (a few cursing words)  
  
Pairing(s): CloudxTifa  
  
Summary: Only love isn't enough for a relantionship. A storm hits Neo-Midgar.  
  
Disclaimer: Cloud, Tifa & FFVII word are copyrighted to Squaresoft. The song "Get it faster" is by Jimmy Eat World.  
  
Author's Notes: It is a break up fic. I just found it challenging, I mean, I don't think anyone's made this pair break up in a fanfic before. I'm not an CloudxAeris-supporter, but I think this fic could be real honey to those kinda people. I do not hate Tifa, she's one of the coolest playable charas in the game. I might've made her a bit of a co-dependant bitch in this fic, but hey, find out for yourself. Personally, I don't really care about the main characters, but this was a challenge. Did I do well? Please read and review.  
  
Dedication: To Sky & Mags, who I hope will always have the chance to be together.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Rain fell down on Neo-Midgar, giving signs of a storm approaching. People ran inside, some just kept running around in the streets, like they had no certain destination. Some people were far too busy with their own thoughts to think of the storm as the first lightning struck. A few windows shook and dogs hid theirselves under the tables. One man on the street stopped. The last of the people on the streets ran inside their houses, or went under some kind of shelters. The man just stood there. His tears of anger mixed with the rain and fell down on the black asphalt. His blond hair was soaked, stucking on to his pearly white skin. His blue eyes flashed and he took a step forward, then another. He glanced the street around ahead of him. No one in sight. His eyes glued to the shining asphalt as he walked faster. Faster...  
  
  
  
(( I don't care what you do  
  
I'm getting out  
  
No, nothing ever shames me))  
  
  
  
Thoughts appeared to him now. There was no real way out. She would always be there. In his nightmares. Haunting.  
  
  
  
Her games weren't tricky nore complicated. She was lovable, sweet, caring. She was, he admitted that. But there was another side of her only he had seen and suffered from. Like just a moment before the rain...  
  
  
  
"I don't know what you're talking about." she said. Turned her back on him. A sight.Soon a storm.  
  
  
  
"You don't know what I've gone through. You just don't. You don't understand. You try to understand, you try to make me shup up about my feelings. I won't. But you don't care. You're empty like that."  
  
  
  
'Soulless?' he had asked. Why? That only gave her more space to hurt.  
  
  
  
"A puppet. What happened to you? Remember... The times we had."  
  
  
  
'Had. We could still have them.'  
  
  
  
"Oh,so it's my fault?"  
  
  
  
The word stung like a black bee of the past. 'A puppet'. A word she had so willingly made him forget. Now it was back.   
  
  
  
Puppet. Nothing more than a puppet.  
  
  
  
Wrath inside of him grew. Why did she do that? Why did she say that? Soon she was probably to turn around, with tears in her big cherry-brown eyes.   
  
  
  
Correct.  
  
  
  
"I'm so scared, Cloud.. I just wanted you to be there."  
  
  
  
'I was there.' Now he turns away. A shoulder to cry on. Always. To make her feel better, of course. Always. Support, eternally. Not anymore.  
  
  
  
"You should at least be sorry. You've broken me inside."  
  
  
  
It stings again.   
  
  
  
'I think you've always been broken inside. There's just no one who could repair you.' he muttered. Anger was taking over all feelings of affection. It had been too long now. Her co-dependancy was strong. Her manipulation was well-hidden.   
  
  
  
(( Don't want a thing from you  
  
I'm going out  
  
I don't care if you're angry))  
  
  
  
He smelled rain. She stood there, staring into his eyes. He bored his own into her expression. It was fake.  
  
  
  
"But I love you."  
  
  
  
'I thought so too.'  
  
  
  
"You love me?"  
  
  
  
He snorted and turned his look away from her. This was it. He could just walk out and leave her there, surrounding her with her own stupidity, her own cluelessness of the situation. His heart said no, but his brain was smarter.   
  
  
  
"You're cold. I never knew this of you."  
  
  
  
'You never fucking knew me anyway.'  
  
  
  
"Why would you say that, we were best friends..." Her voice shivered. She's weakening. Losing her touch. His heart was weak too. Wanted to be hers again, the shoulder to cry on, the eternal support. But not now. Never.  
  
  
  
'We were not!' he yelled and then laughed under his breath. 'Now who's twisting the truth.'  
  
  
  
"I don't know what you're mean, but I'm getting angry now, Cloud Strife! All this rubbish about us two not being--"  
  
  
  
'There is no us.' He walked away. The door, the escape. She didn't try to stop, he guessed she knew she couldn't.  
  
  
  
He looked at her. Cold, blue eyes bored into her brain, trying to find out what she was thinking. She had no words. He left. The door closed. The noise of a thunder came from the window. She went to close it. But it was all hollow now.  
  
  
  
((I should have thought things through  
  
I'm holding out but not getting an answer))  
  
  
  
The sidewalk glitters, for some reason it irritates his eyes and he has to look up again. He had no place to go. He wasn't going to hide.   
  
  
  
His heart ached. It spoke the language of it's own, the one she only could understand. But there was no "her" anymore. It wasn't right anymore.  
  
  
  
The lies of his pleading heart were telling him to go back. Say sorry. Be sorry. Give her a hug. But the idea of touching her skin again brought repulsion to him. The idea of seeing her again made him angry. The thought of them spending time together seemed like a suicide.   
  
  
  
Suddenly, like without a reason, like an illusion or a bad joke. There she stood. Her coat pulled quickly around her. Her hair soaked, yet less soaked than his.   
  
  
  
((I want to do right by you  
  
I'm finding out   
  
cheating gets it faster))  
  
  
  
Words, that she had either discovered inside of her, or just made up, flowed out of her mouth. His heart listened excitedly and jumped from joy. Reasons to live with her again, reasons to love! Love, love and love! Now and tomorrow, forever and ever.   
  
  
  
His mind didn't listen, it gave her looks like spikes of ice. They never hit her, they never hurt her. He never meant that.   
  
  
  
She noticed.  
  
  
  
"You're just not listening, are you? Oh, I get it. You've already got your plans made up. You're going to go to her. Going to be with her. You think she's the one for you. You're certain you love her."  
  
  
  
'No, you can be sure I hate her as much as I hate you.' He knew it was harsh. He did not care.  
  
  
  
"I-I can't live without you."  
  
  
  
'You've never even tried, Tifa, so why not try it?'  
  
  
  
"You're mean, your eyes are cold and your smile is mocking. Why are you doing this?"  
  
  
  
'You don't want to know, dear.'  
  
  
  
"You're hurting me intentionally, Cloud! What have I done so bad?"  
  
  
  
'Shut up, I know what I'm doing. I'm gonna go now. Don't follow me.' He turned around to leave.  
  
  
  
"But I-"  
  
  
  
'I said don't follow me!'  
  
  
  
Loud sobs. He cringed. His heart spoke again. His mind was too blurred to listen.   
  
  
  
"Is it goodbye?" she shouted between the sobs. He turned around. She wiped her tears hastily and pushed wet strands of hair off her face.  
  
  
  
'It is.' he simply replied and walked on. No sobbing. No crying. No reply.  
  
  
  
'Perhaps it wasn't that hard for you, either.'  
  
  
  
The asphalt shone and he had to look away. Rain had stopped. People coming out of the houses, getting back to the routine.   
  
  
  
'Perhaps we're both just learning...'  
  
  
  
A small kid runs into him.  
  
  
  
"Sorry sir!!"  
  
  
  
Runs off.  
  
  
  
He doesn't pay attention, but quickens his pace. Faster.. Faster...  
  
~author's update~ 8/25/02 *~ Yes, hello. I am not changing this to suit your prefers. Tifa and Cloud do break up, not all love lasts forever, this is heavy text, if you can't handle it, don't. Judge it as writing. And if you just don't like the idea of Tifa and Cloud breaking up, don't tell me that. I never forced you to read. 


	2. two let us submerge

First of all // I don't need to justify myself or my writing. I write what I write, I write what I wish to write.  
You don't like it, I never told you to read it. If I did, you're most probably a friend and weren't offended by it in any way.  
  
It's only fanfiction. Never mind one of my best works ever, so stumble your way out, if you love CloTi to death. This piece of fiction might kill you.  
Anywhoo, it's not owned by moi, it's owned by Square. If you wish to distribute this text, email me or AT LEAST credit me with my email on it.  
{{NOTE: It is CloTi. It isn't CloTi where they end up together. If you wanna see them all happy and mushy and all that, don't read this. Clear?}} That was to every flamer, Flesh-N-Bone in mind.  
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I'm crying so hard I'm trembling. I wrap my arms around me and feel my head falling, my eyes closing. So it's over. Finally. I knew it wouldn't last. I told myself it couldn't last. I never believed in good things happening to me.   
  
For a bittersweet while our love was pure and simple. It was us, tightly together, against the rest of the world, big forces. If they struck, we'd still be together. Eternal, huh? Love, huh? No. When we were alone, it wasn't as easy as we'd thought. It had been so long, perhaps too long.   
  
Structures fall down and crash. I keep blaming myself, because I still love him. Still care.  
  
I wake up. It's dark and cold, so I go to the closet, pull a blanket and return to my bed. It's unfair. I can still sense him, his smell is stuck on the sheets, on the pillow. I cry a little more, but realise that crying in the dark won't help my self-hatred. I rewind, back to Nibelheim, back to the crater... Back to the new beginning. Neo Midgar is being re-built, great ardour was in the air.  
  
"It's a new beginning," he says.  
"I know."  
"Things will be fine."  
"They will."  
"And you will..."  
"..not live on the Sector 7. There are no sectors. I know." I smile at him. Mirth bubbles inside me. I feel free.  
"Let's move to that beach house we bought."  
I look at him in shock. "Why?"  
"We'll be happy there. We'll get to be alone. It'll be great, whaddya say?"  
"We should stay in Midgar." I don't know why I say that.  
"If it makes you happy," he nods.  
"I already am."  
  
The caress felt so real that time. I could be the one he loved, now and forever. But in the backround there was always such doubt. He does not love, he does not care. He loves someone other.   
  
He imagines her when he kisses me.   
  
I cannot sleep, so I get up and force myself to the window. Suddenly a voice behind me sighs. I turn around hastily and stare into the wet eyes of a child.  
  
"Marlene.. Go back to bed. It's late." I feel so guilty.  
"I can't sleepy, Auntie."  
"Your dad is fine, if that's what's keeping you awake. He'll pick you up tomorrow." I turn to window.  
"It's not that."  
"Do you want some milk?"  
"You were crying."  
"Yes," I answer. "I was." There's no point in lying to a child.  
"Why?"  
"It's ..not important. Go to bed."  
  
We walk to her small room, I pull a blanket over her and kiss her forehead. She stares at me. She knows. I try to smile, but can't.   
  
A memory of him stings my chest. This'll be over. I'll be over. 


End file.
